Observations from an Outsider...
Feb. 3rd, 2008 07:43 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mdehnersNo matter what group I’m in, I’m always a little bit Outside. I don’t fit perfectly in any. This has it’s +’s and –‘s. One big + is that I’m a member of more groups than I would be otherwise! That said, I’m noticed a few things over the yrs….
Groups, large and small have either of two basic Core values toward Outsiders: To Assimilate or Shun. While both truly exist in the group dynamic, one is always the Dominant. The Assimilationist seems at 1st to be the most Benign. You are Welcomed. Folks are pleasant and are glad to point out your Commonalities in Belief. If the group is small, this may be as far as it goes, but usually once this point has been reached, your contrary views get worked on so that you’ll “fit in”. In the not to distant future, you will either be Assimilated or will have to leave for your own piece of mind. You, not them because they wish you to stay and join the Commonality….
The Isolationist seems cold at 1st. When small, differences are generally Ignored and common ground supported. As the group grows, the pressure to either “get with it or get out” becomes stronger. Those that don’t “follow the party line” are expelled. Oddly enough, the relationship may actually become deeper afterwards. Isolationist models tend to have no problem with Outsiders unless they are (in their view) attacking their Beliefs. Once you aren’t “Them”, you’re treated like everyone else….
With Isolationists, once it’s “Over”, it’s “Over”. With Assimilationists, it’s never “Over”, “there’s always Hope” that the Outsider can be brought into the Collective. This is also one of the big reasons the two types don’t get along. Isolationists don’t Understand why Assimilationists are fighting the same fight over and over. Assimilationists can’t Understand why Isolationists didn’t Change in the 1st place and since they Know they’re Right….
Truth,
Pat
Groups, large and small have either of two basic Core values toward Outsiders: To Assimilate or Shun. While both truly exist in the group dynamic, one is always the Dominant. The Assimilationist seems at 1st to be the most Benign. You are Welcomed. Folks are pleasant and are glad to point out your Commonalities in Belief. If the group is small, this may be as far as it goes, but usually once this point has been reached, your contrary views get worked on so that you’ll “fit in”. In the not to distant future, you will either be Assimilated or will have to leave for your own piece of mind. You, not them because they wish you to stay and join the Commonality….
The Isolationist seems cold at 1st. When small, differences are generally Ignored and common ground supported. As the group grows, the pressure to either “get with it or get out” becomes stronger. Those that don’t “follow the party line” are expelled. Oddly enough, the relationship may actually become deeper afterwards. Isolationist models tend to have no problem with Outsiders unless they are (in their view) attacking their Beliefs. Once you aren’t “Them”, you’re treated like everyone else….
With Isolationists, once it’s “Over”, it’s “Over”. With Assimilationists, it’s never “Over”, “there’s always Hope” that the Outsider can be brought into the Collective. This is also one of the big reasons the two types don’t get along. Isolationists don’t Understand why Assimilationists are fighting the same fight over and over. Assimilationists can’t Understand why Isolationists didn’t Change in the 1st place and since they Know they’re Right….
Truth,
Pat
